Why do I tell stories?

          Have you ever given someone advice or told them a personal story that you hoped would help them? Many times in the counseling field they suggest that you don’t use personal stories with clients so they won’t use them as leverage. While that is practical and understandable, I often use my own stories because I may have walked where that person walked or I have felt what they have felt.

          I always enjoyed sharing my life stories with the young people I supervised in juvenile corrections. I would usually preface it with the statement, “Let me tell you a story . . .” Their eyes would roll and some would groan (mostly for show for the other members in the group – can’t show any weakness you know), but then they would all lean in to hear the story.

          I am a good story teller and most of my stories had a point – a life lesson if you’ll pardon the pun. It is a way of communicating and remarkably many of my young friends remembered the stories!

          How do I know? I have been out of youth corrections for over 10 years but I still meet some of my former charges in stores and gas stations. Many times they are anxious to show me their family, new car, or brag about the job they have. They are truly glad to see me and to let me know they are doing all right.

Then they will say something like, “remember that time . . .?” or “I remember a story you told and it helped me.”

          I know that there are some who didn’t listen to the lesson that I and others invested into them because I see them frequently in police blotters in the paper or their mug shot on the news. That could be depressing except for a lesson I learned very early on working in the prison – don’t count your losses because they will overwhelm you! Count the wins, the successes.

          So when one of my young people comes up and shakes my hand or hugs me I know that some little portion of what I told them stuck! I had input into a young life and hopefully a life lesson will be borrowed by them to pass down to their family.

And when they start to call me “Mr. Smith” out of resApect, I tell them, “You can call me ‘Mario’.” You should see the look of pride come in their eyes!

So remember, whether it is with your own children, or people you work with, you can input your own life lessons into them. Who knows what the return will be?